- Episode AI notes
- Practical wisdom is emphasized over theoretical knowledge, urging the application of core truths like Jesus’s sacrifice and love.
- The importance of authenticity over borrowed identity is highlighted, urging individuals to be true to themselves rather than imitating others.
- Struggling with seeking acceptance through communication is discussed, emphasizing the impact of insecurities on one’s communication style.
- Authenticity is prioritized over acceptance, acknowledging the need for internal validation rather than seeking external approval.
- Approaching art with implicit Christian themes is suggested, drawing inspiration from artists like C.S. Lewis and Tolkien to convey faith creatively.
- Embracing individuality and overcoming stereotypes is encouraged, urging individuals to be authentic and relatable in their mission.
- Sharing the gospel message with compassion and empathy is crucial, as being obnoxious can alienate others from receiving the message.
- Focusing on living as an urban missionary daily is emphasized, highlighting the importance of building relationships based on love and mutual respect.
- Struggling with public perception is discussed, with the speaker expressing a desire to lead a Christian life without being preachy.
- Strength in vulnerability and relatability is valued over assuming a prophetic demeanor, emphasizing the importance of authenticity in interpersonal relationships.
- Learning humility and empathy through personal struggles is important, highlighting the need for God’s grace and vulnerability to grow and learn.
Embracing authenticity over comparison is advised, encouraging individuals to be comfortable in their unique qualities and ways of worship. Time 0:00:00
Practical Wisdom Over Theoretical Knowledge The speaker reflects on the transition from theoretical knowledge to practical wisdom in the context of marriage. They highlight the importance of moving from simply knowing facts to applying them in real life. The speaker acknowledges the value of basic teachings but emphasizes the need to internalize and apply the lessons personally rather than merely regurgitating information learned from others. They stress the simplicity and importance of core truths such as Jesus’s sacrifice and love.
Speaker 1
It’s more facts. It’s more theory, right? Like the idea of grace in marriage was theoretical. I can tell you that’s what the scripture says. You need to be gracious to your wife or your husband, but when you’ve only just been married, it’s more theory than it is like practiced wisdom. So what you have here is a person who is very theoretical, who’s learning stuff in seminary and communicating it, right? I’m learning stuff from books I’m reading, and I’m, if John Piper said it, so shall I. I think that there was a healthiness in the fact that people were able to get just very didactic, basic teaching, but there was also an unhealthiness in the fact that a lot of this was theory For me. A lot of this wasn’t even my time in the word, you know, digesting it. It was like I was a baby bird eating someone else’s chewed up information and swallowing it and spitting it back out to the rest of the world, but it is very simple. It is very, it’s like Jesus died, resurrected. He loves you, you know, and that it was the simplicity of that.Authenticity over Borrowed Identity The individual in the snip reflects on their identity as an indigenous minister in urban culture, leveraging their music and artistry to convey God’s will. They acknowledge borrowing the term ‘indigenous minister of the gospel’ from others to sound knowledgeable and insightful, but admit that a more self-assured version of themselves would not describe themselves this way. The importance of authenticity over borrowed identity is highlighted through this introspection.
Speaker 1
Well, first and foremost, I see myself as an indigenous minister in urban culture. And my music, my artistry is really generating a platform for me to be able to articulate the revealed will of God. Okay. So I have to stop because I know me. Y’all don’t know me. I know me. Let me tell you what this dude, right? Let me tell you about this guy right here besides the fact that his hair cut is pretty bad. Let me tell you about this guy. This guy just said, I’m an indigenous minister of the gospel. There’s nothing wrong with that other than the fact that that’s borrowed language from Eric Mason and William Branch, known as the ambassador who were pastors in Philadelphia. It’s borrowed language that I just received. I just wanted to sound good and like I was intelligent and that I knew what I was talking about. Does being an indigenous minister of the gospel make sense? Sure. But is that something that a more secure in himself, LaCray would say, not at all?Seeking Acceptance Through Communication The speaker reflects on the difference between his communication style and that of an influential figure, highlighting his own insecurities and desire for acceptance. He recognizes that his communication in that moment was not authentic but rather a result of wanting acknowledgment and love from someone he looks up to. This reflection emphasizes the internal struggle for acceptance and the impact it has on one’s communication style.
Speaker 1
Does being an indigenous minister of the gospel make sense? Sure. But is that something that a more secure in himself, LaCray would say, not at all? That’s not the way I talk. I want to articulate the revealed will of God. That’s not LaCray. I mean, that’s not the way LaCray really talks. That is an insecure kid standing in front of, at that point in time, one of his heroes and not wanting to say something stupid. So how does John Piper talk? He would say stuff like the revealed will of God. That’s in the scripture. So I’m not saying that’s bad talk. I’m just saying that’s not the way I communicate. This is an inauthentic picture of me trying to find acceptance. And I see it. I see myself like, oh my gosh, John Piper is acknowledging me. I’m a kid who grew up and his father abandoned him. I’m a kid who men threw him in the trunk for making the wrong decisions. And so now someone that I look up to wants to put their arm around me and acknowledge me, I just want to be loved. I want to be accepted. So is anything I’m saying untrue, not at all? It’s not what was being said. It’s the internal components, right? And so this person was an echo chamber.Authenticity Over Acceptance The speaker reflects on a moment where he didn’t communicate authentically in front of John Piper, citing his troubled past and deep desire for acceptance. He explains that his way of talking is different from John Piper’s sophisticated language, attributing his moment of inauthenticity to seeking approval and recognition from his hero. The speaker acknowledges the need for love and acceptance due to past abandonment and harsh experiences. He emphasizes that the issue lies in seeking external validation rather than genuinely wrestling with internal thoughts and arriving at personal conclusions.
Speaker 1
That’s not the way I talk. I want to articulate the revealed will of God. That’s not LaCray. I mean, that’s not the way LaCray really talks. That is an insecure kid standing in front of, at that point in time, one of his heroes and not wanting to say something stupid. So how does John Piper talk? He would say stuff like the revealed will of God. That’s in the scripture. So I’m not saying that’s bad talk. I’m just saying that’s not the way I communicate. This is an inauthentic picture of me trying to find acceptance. And I see it. I see myself like, oh my gosh, John Piper is acknowledging me. I’m a kid who grew up and his father abandoned him. I’m a kid who men threw him in the trunk for making the wrong decisions. And so now someone that I look up to wants to put their arm around me and acknowledge me, I just want to be loved. I want to be accepted. So is anything I’m saying untrue, not at all? It’s not what was being said. It’s the internal components, right? And so this person was an echo chamber. This was not a person who sat and just wrestled and came to these conclusions. This is a person who’s like, I don’t know where to go, but what do you think?Implicit Faith Expression in Art The speaker, a Christian rapper, was inspired by Tim Keller’s Missiology and the experiences of artists integrating their faith in their work. He learned from a professor at Calvin College to approach art not as explicitly Christian but to let Christian themes naturally bleed out in the essence of the work, similar to C.S. Lewis and Tolkien. The focus was on being implicit rather than explicit in conveying the values and essence of faith through creative expression.
Speaker 1
There was nobody I could name who was a Christian rapper who grew up on hip-hop in a hip-hop culture and then entered back into that space and was trying to be a relevant missionary to the Culture. So what you’re seeing is someone trying to process and practice things in real time. I had just been studying a lot of Tim Keller at this point in time in his work on Missiology. I had been studying the Center for Work and Faith in learning how actors and dancers, ballerinas and so forth were processing their faith in real time on Broadway and in New York City. And so I was at Calvin College with a guy with a friend of mine who was a professor there and he was talking about how he engaged the art world as not a Christian artist, but as an artist who Had a Christian faith or a belief in Jesus. And his philosophy was a lot like C.S. Lewis or Tolkien where the thought process was, I don’t want to, I don’t want the Lord of the Rings to be a Christian movie. I want you to be able to prick it with a pen and it believes out the essence of who Jesus is. The essence in the heart, the love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, gents on itself control of the fruit of the spirit is bleeding out in themes in the film. So it was not, at this point in time I was trying to figure out how to practice not being explicit, but implicit.Embracing Individuality and Overcoming Stereotypes The speaker felt immense pressure being the first Christian rapper making achievements like appearing on Sway in the Morning and winning a Grammy. They faced criticism and stereotypes like being labeled ‘corny’ for blending hip hop with gospel. Despite facing negativity, the speaker embraced their individuality and aimed to debunk stereotypes by being authentic and relatable as a missionary spreading their message in the world.
Speaker 1
It’s a lot of wedding your shoulders to be the first Christian rapper to be on sway in the morning. It’s a lot of wedding your shoulders to be the first Christian rapper to win a Grammy. There’s just a lot of pressure that comes with that. And I was carrying it as if I had to be the sole representative of Jesus in the space of hip hop. And I wanted to do it right. And I knew what you see is all the opposition, all the like your corny or Christian rapper’s corny. You don’t see the time I went to an NBA practice and I was passing out my mixtape. And someone said, this is gospel. I ain’t listening in this trash. A player, I couldn’t even look at that player the same no more. You know what I’m saying? I’m just being honest. But, you know, I ain’t got no hate for him though. Shout out to the Marcus Cousins. I ain’t got no hate for you, bro. Because people thought Christian rappers corny. It was just a thing. I had to fight against that. Now the fans didn’t think it was corny. So they’re like, look, why are you worried about what everybody? Why you want to be accepted by the world so bad? Good question. Because I saw myself as a missionary. If you go to China, you don’t want to just be the American who doesn’t mix it up with the people in the culture. You don’t want to just be the American who’s like, hey everybody, if you want to know about Jesus come to this church, we’re going to be talking about Jesus how He died for your sins. Like that’s not how you reach them.Effectiveness of Sharing the Gospel Sharing the gospel message directly without building relationships can come across as obnoxious and lead to rejection. Emphasizing the importance of living for Christ is valid, but without showing compassion, kindness, and understanding, the message may not be well-received. Being obnoxious and lacking empathy can hinder the effectiveness of sharing the gospel message and alienate others.
Speaker 1
And you just wonder why the folks who are just like Jesus died for you, you’re in sin. And all the stuff I said on rebel, right? If I was to just come to somebody and just tell them straight up and down, like, hey, stranger, don’t waste your life. You got one life to live. Everything you do will last. Only what you do for Christ will last. There’s nothing wrong with that statement. It’s a true statement. It’s just void of any kind of relationship. And if I tell a stranger that, they’re going to say, man, get out of my face. You wonder why you don’t see those types of people last very long in the media, right? Because those people are more obnoxious than they are loving. People would say, man, these folks didn’t last long in these spaces and places because the Bible says that if they rejected me, they’ll reject you. And they’re just being rejected for preaching the gospel. No, they’re being rejected for being obnoxious. That’s why they’re being rejected because they’re not compassionate, kind, thoughtful people. They’re just being obnoxious and not reading the room. They’re not reading the room. SoChasing the Work, Not the Limelight The speaker embraced the missionary ideas presented by Tim Keller and Eric Mason, focusing on living as an urban missionary daily. While achieving success with Grammys and top albums, the speaker emphasized not chasing after these accolades but putting in the work within the urban community. By building relationships based on love and mutual respect, the speaker’s presence was known for their faith in Jesus without compromising their values.
Speaker 1
And again, y’all, I’m not saying I did it perfectly. I’m saying this was me trying out these ideas that people like Tim Keller put in front of me and said, hey, this is what it looks like to be a missionary in your city. Eric Mason said, this is what it means to be an urban missionary. I’m living it out every day. So it wasn’t like I’m chasing after the limelight. The limelight was coming to me. Right? I didn’t chase the Grammy. The Grammy came to me. I didn’t chase the number one album. The number one album came to me. I wasn’t chasing any of these things. I did not run after that. It came to me. What I was chasing was doing the work. I was living in the urban community trying to reach these people. I was getting involved in these spaces and places. I’m having conversations with, you know, rap artists trying to build and develop stuff. There’s no one in the industry who didn’t know I love Jesus and they didn’t. They weren’t thinking, oh, when I get around cray, I could smoke with him. When I get around cray, you know, we can go to the strip club together. That’s not the case. It was they know where I stood, but they also knew I love them. And, you know, we had a relational dynamic. Now let’s get into 2015, which was an interesting time.Struggling with Public Perception The speaker reveals grappling with the fear of man and public perception in their life. They express a desire to lead a Christian life while creating music without being preachy, akin to Tori Kelly. The speaker feels judged for their approach while noting the change and growth in individuals over time. They express fatigue with societal expectations and a preference for being a ‘sawmist’ like David from the Psalms, rather than a prophet.
Speaker 1
So let me put you in front of millions of people and in front of, you know, Robin and Michael. And let’s see if you just keep it all together. And so I knew I was wrestling with in this season of my life is the fear of man. Because this is where I started to feel like, well, maybe, maybe I can just be a Christian and do good things and make good music, be a faithful member of my church, pay my tithes and offerings, Serve the community. But out facing, I just make good music. You know, honestly, at this point in time, it was like kind of me and Tori Kelly, like wanting to take the Tori Kelly route, you know, she, we know she loves the Lord, but her music is not Like preachy. She’s not, we’re not expecting her to get on television and say, Jesus died for your sins. And no one’s condemning her for that. That’s part of the problem was everyone’s condemning me for it. And I was like, Oh, why y’all condemning me? I don’t do that to them. Well, this is how you started. And it is. But people change, people process, people wrestle. I thought, well, maybe I can do it. Tori Kelly’s way. No one’s mad at her because honestly, I was tired of being in the echo chamber. I’m really a sawmist. I’m not a prophet. I, I, I like the Psalms. I like David better. I named my son David because I, I like David.Authenticity and Relatability Over Prophetic Aura The speaker acknowledges that their strength lies in vulnerability and relatability rather than presenting themselves as a prophet. They admire individuals with a prophetic energy like Jackie Hill Perry but recognize that authenticity is being true to oneself. They prefer building relationships, walking with people, and pointing them towards hard truths in an interpersonal manner rather than assuming a prophetic demeanor. The speaker contrasts their outgoing nature with Jackie’s quiet demeanor, emphasizing the importance of being genuine and true to oneself while navigating public exposure.
Speaker 1
That’s what people love me for. The vulnerability, the songs like praying for you, the songs like, you know, journey or deconstruction. I presented myself as a prophet because I admired them and I felt like that’s what it meant to be a Christian. I love Jackie Hill Perry. She has such profit energy. I’m not Jackie. I’m not. And I can’t be. I’d be inauthentically me if I was. I am the type of person that is, I want to build relationships. I want to walk with people. I want to talk with them. I definitely want to point them in the direction of hard truth and hard things, but people are going to see me more as when they know me. Interpersonally, man, he’s a good dude. Like, you know, I’m not bragging to myself. I’m just saying people would be like, man, I like hanging with him or he’s cool or he’s whatever. They’re not going to be like every five minutes, I’m dropping gems on her head. I’m more interpersonal. Jackie’s quiet in real life. She’s chill. She’s processing. You might think she’s standoffish, triply, same, but they’re also very profound when they get their thoughts out. And I know who I am and I was trying to find who I was. And it’s hard to find yourself when you’re dealing with new things in front of the world.Communal Identity in the African American Community A public figure and advocate for the black community faced criticism from white peers for expressing his pain and acknowledging social issues. The African American community’s communal nature leads to a strong sense of collective identity and responsibility, where individuals feel connected to and affected by the actions of others in the community. This communal identity results in internalized feelings of shame or embarrassment when witnessing misbehavior by other black individuals, as it reflects poorly on the community as a whole. In contrast, the speaker highlights the more individualistic nature of white communities, where individuals do not feel the same collective responsibility or connection to the actions of others in their racial group.
Speaker 1
And I was a public figure and a voice who was starting to acknowledge the pain going on in the black community. My white Christian brother and sister did not like that. Right? They felt like I was being a race bader, social justice warrior, ethnic Gnostic, like all these terms. And it was really frustrating because I was in real pain, right? Like when I would watch the murders of innocent people get killed, when I saw Eric Garner just murdered in front of me on video, it broke my heart. And I think what people don’t realize is that the African American community is small and we are very communal. So when a black person walks into a restaurant and sees another black person, it’s kind of like you acknowledge them generally, unless you live in Atlanta or somewhere you see black People all the time. But if I’m in Idaho or somewhere like that, I see another black person in the restaurant, you acknowledge them. What’s going on, bro? What’s going on? How you doing? I see you. If you see a black person acting unruly, you fight an internal embarrassment because it’s like, oh, we have a saying, you messing it up for us. You making us look bad because we see ourselves as a collective. My white friends would never see a white person in a restaurant acting up thinking, oh my gosh, this guy’s making white people look stupid. It’s not the way they’re much more individual. We are super communal. And so to see Eric Garner killed, it was like seeing someone I knew get killed.Learning Humility and Empathy through Struggles One can learn lessons of humility and empathy through personal struggles and challenges. Trying to earn God’s approval through self-righteous acts can lead to internal suffering and condemnation. It is essential to realize the need for God’s grace and to embrace vulnerability in order to grow and learn from life’s experiences.
Speaker 1
Now God disciplines for sure, but he’s so loving in the process what we are and have been as a culture and who I was because I know me was the older brother in the prodigal story. I was the older brother. This is how it’s done. This is what you do to please God. This is what you say. This is how you move. These are the buttons that you push and as long as I’m pushing those buttons, no one will ever see I’m wrong. Meanwhile, internally I am dying. I’m dying of self righteousness. I’m dying of pride. I’m condemning myself. I’m going to bed at night. Masterbating and doing 200 pushups because I’m trying to pay penance for the masturbation that I just committed, which is stupid as if God isn’t sitting there like, yo, Craig, why are You beating yourself up as if you think you would have you can’t believe you did that? Why do you think you can’t believe you? Why can’t you believe you did that? Oh, you think you’re perfect. You think you got it together. You don’t know you need me and I had to become the little brother. I had to become the son in the prodigal story. I had to go out there in the world after getting beat up and just go do it my way and learn there’s no goodness out there except the goodness of God. And then he welcomed me back but different than I was. He welcomed me back and now I’m empathetic.Authenticity Over Comparison One should embrace their authentic self instead of comparing themselves to others. Being comfortable in one’s own way of worship, behavior, and habits is essential. It is important not to judge others or feel judged for being different. Embracing one’s unique qualities, such as being relational, diplomatic, and a problem solver, can have a positive impact on interactions with others.
Speaker 1
I do not do that. Not because I don’t love the Lord. I may spend an hour, maybe two on a great day. I’m not spending four hours at a minimum in the scriptures. That’s what he loves to do. But he’s not self-righteous. He’s not judging everybody else around him saying I can’t believe you’re not studying the word four hours like I do. He wakes up at four in the morning. I don’t get up at four in the morning. Not because I’m undisciplining and he’s not judgmental. How are you all? Can you not get up at four? You’re so undisciplined. I’m like brother. My body don’t even begin to function at four. I don’t even know if my heart is beating at four. I’m probably half dead. It’s not a good look for me. I am comfortable being who God has called me to be. God has called me to be relational. I’m more relational. I am diplomatic in a lot of ways and I’m a problem solver. I like to get to the root of it in a loving way and people walk away saying dang, I didn’t think about it like that. Thank you for that. That’s very helpful. It happens all the time. I’m not going to beat you up. I’m not going to be the person that punched you in your chest with a profound truth and you’re like, dang, but that’s what people want me to be because I was doing that in my first projects. But it wasn’t me. That’s what I’m trying to tell y’all. It was an inauthentic version of me.
